Okay, while we’re on the topic of death, I’m kinda facing a semi-relevant situation.

I failed a swallow study and docs and therapists are pushing me to a feeding tube. My dad is too.

I don’t want one, even if it means dying of pneumonia possibly early. I have a living will that says I don’t want one.

My dad says I’d be ‘throwing away my life’ but I want to die aware and making my own choices. Plus, a PEG tube won’t stop pneumonia and has risks of infection.

Complicating all of this, my mom wants to void being my power of attorney and my dad is the alternate. I think if he becomes my poa he can make medical decisions for me?

I’d try to update my living will and power of attorney but i live with my dad and that would cause conflict.

I’m really lost.

Moi - Cuz they suck balls, man. They suck balls.
I've got a place representing me this time so I hope that it goes better. I have two doctors appointments set up to check me out. Hopefully they actually look at me this time instead of just glancing at me from far away.

That is sad. But at least y'all didn't have to worry about everything.

Yeah, I have mixed feelings on throwing out some of her stuff. Other stuff I am totally okay with throwing away because she was a bit of a hoarder. lol.

I also don't have a lot of stuff. I guess I would give it all to my husband. If he's dead too then it all goes to my best friend and my niece.

I would want to give all my stuff away on my accounts too but I don't know who I would trust with that.


Audriella - Honestly it's your body and your choice. If you don't want a feeding tube then don't get one. Your dad doesn't own you.

I would change your POA if he's not cooperating with you.
Do you have any aunts/uncles or cousins that might be willing to do it?

There also might be resources online that you could find to help you. Like disability advocates in your area? They might be able to provide someone who will follow your wishes.



I'm kind of on the fence about dying. If I'm on life support and the doctor says there's almost no chance of me waking up, go ahead and pull the plug. If they do say that I might recover then I would want them to wait a little while. See if I do wake up. Though if my way of life would be any more difficult than it currently is, fuck that. Just let me go. lol.

My dad and I have had a bit of a misunderstanding, I think. So that’s cleared a bit, thankfully.

I found a local clinic that may deal with these kinds of things, so trying to get their opinion on the value of a feeding tube for me.

I also talked, sort of, to a friend’s nurse mom and that helped. Really, I don’t think a feeding tube is a good idea, and I’m trying to make that very, very clear.

Ugh, I don’t need all this nonsense.

Good luck getting disability light! It’s a really terrible process.

Idk about disability, prolly not, but mom and dad have gimp passes
Dad has a blue one
Mom has a red one
Mom's comes with snarky comments

Red is six months
Blue is...several years

Temporary versus permanent

I read that there was a place that had been full of people who were extremely bad about the handicap parking only to where those with wheelchairs took spare and blocked off all the parking spots with the wheelchairs with the "justifications" people use to try and get out of their illegal parking
Shit like "I'll only be a minute"
That place saw a severe drop in that problem after that stunt, they left the wheelchairs out all day, forcing the inconsiderate fuckwits to park farther away in the parking spots they're supposed to use
And lesson learned, for most of them