It sounds to me like you're having high expectations of yourself.
Don't try to be like someone without autism, you describe very well how autism affects you: this and that is hard, but I still should be able to do it, is what I hear from you.
I have one leg but I still should be able to run, because everyone with 2 legs can.
I think it's very unfair towards you. If you could "just do it", you would have a long time ago. Get to know yourself, and not only in what you cannot do, but also what you can do. Whats are the things you're good at?
By tirelessly trying to be someone without autism, you're burning yourself out, and that can lead to anxiety and depression.
My advice would really be: be kind to yourself. I would also have no motivation at all if you're struggling with daily stuff but expect yourself to study or get a job, that's such a mountain of work and effort that seems way too big to achieve in short term.
If preparing food is too hard and not your priority right now, try to find ways to avoid the problem instead of being confronted with it everyday. Breakfast biscuits for example need no bowl or preparation: you open the package and eat it. Takeaway is already in a container, buying already prepared meals etc.
And if you want to work on it, do it one meal at a time: master cereal first for example. Make it a song if you have affinity with sound, where you sing what you're doing it while preparing it, or just anything that makes it less unpleasant.
Use what you're good at to overcome difficulty. And yes, you will probably do certain things differently than other people, but that's okay.
Good luck with everything, you seem at a really low point in life right now. Sending you some love