I wouldn't include my struggle as being a unwilling helpless NEET for months before getting another job as I don't see even a slight link of it to the topic..

so I'll just go into some of my past struggles.
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I have the same dilemma with socializing and trusting issues with others on my teenage years. I don't know how I've overcome that part of my life as I have received no medical help nor any advice on people outside the online world. Then I have seemed to reach a boiling point and got so pissed off with awful things going on with my life and how I'm unable to confront problems, that I learned to rebel and forcefully change myself. pretended to like things what society considered as cool people do. which thrice as stressful as my latter struggle.
realization hit when I got to experience both worlds of what I to change about me versus what I thought I really want for myself. well, that's how it worked for me. That's how I realize that I want to change but don't want to change to just fit in but to change for myself and be better. That's how I learned to balance the things I've learned from those experiences.
that's all a thing of a past now for me, I'm glad I get to snap out of that situation.
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phobia's are hard to overcome, so I know how you feel. You can't just snap out of it, it takes time. I have cynophobia, and up to this day I still hadn't overcome that fear, but I'm hoping to get rid of it once I got the time and sign up for some 8EDIT -- TYPO
psychotherapy 'session' to overcome my fear.
yes, struggles freakin' scares me everytime and it doesn't help that I'm not priveledge to always find help from other people so in the end Im often left with no choice but to face it and come up with solutions to it.