Kingdom of Knuffel

Yeah thats exactly why I need to talk to her for the closure haha
I feel like she probably wont be receptive but that's the point lol
ty

Good luck then and be strong

Ty

I love your avi :0

I'm so nervoooooouuusss.... And I realize I'm an idiot, I don't want that job, I wanna stay home forever and work from home, aaaah

I like being at home, going out for shopping and asking bf what he want for dinner should I buy anything specific... But I'm afraid that can't happen. Someone help me omg, I'm so pathetic.
I don't want that job interview

Mem <3 <3 <3 I feel you so much. I just went from a part time to a full time job and it feels like I'm stretched thin and there's not enough "me" left at the end of the day or the weekend. I was terrified to take this job and I'm terrified that by the time my contract ends, they will offer me another one. But also terrified that they won't and it will have been grindy work for nothing? Why am I like this...

Work is scary. And it's essential. And for some fucking reason it's also the worst thing in the world. Why is our society built in a way that we are miserable? Yeah, there are a few talented geniuses who are doing what they believe in, or there are people that don't seem to mind their jobs, which I wish I could be like. Those people amaze me.

So... I know this wasn't much in the way of advice. But I want you to know I feel you completely. I wish I could work from home. Or even do fewer hours.

But you are not pathetic. I feel the same way you do, and so must others, even if we don't hear about them in society. You're brave for taking a step that pushes up against your fears and no one can say you aren't!

Thanks you Feb *hugs* That helped a little. It's just I feel pathetic because it feels it's wrong to not want a job. And I'm still terrified I might get called and invited for a job interview, or actually offered a job. It sounds like I'm a horrible person that wants things for free and it's really not the case.
Yesterday my phone called and I didn't realize it was my boss so I was literally shaking whn answering and truly relieved it was just him. Doesn't that mean that I'm a mess and I don't fit in the said society? Feeling like I don't fit in makes me miserable but also forcing myself into the stupid rules makes me the same.
And I'm not even trying that hard to find anything. Maybe I will once I'm completely without a job, that mihgt happen somewhere in April.

You don't sound like a horrible person, I totally get you <3
My mother is very much 'if you aren't working then you are a strain to society' person. The other day I took a sick day, and she chose to speak to me about method employers use to compare your sick days to your period of employment,because I'm on a fixed contract (and clearly my impending joblessness is something I want to think about when I'm sick... right.). She then went on to say that there are people who go into work when they're dying because they don't want to make a bad impression. Thanks for making me seem like a lazy bum, mom. What a charmer.

You are not alone in this. <3 It makes complete sense to feel badly about giving up your personal time.
In a world where every employer is motivated by the company's wishes, it really is an uphill struggle to protect your personal time and your personal best wishes. Especially for the people who are introverted, or are quite private people (I speak from experience

).
Like, yikes, my last job was very clique-y and I somehow offended people I'd barely spoken to by not adding them on social media.

This is my personal page for my personal friends!

We try and push ourselves into the mold set by other people, but everyone is different and need different balances in life - particularly for those who find it harder to be in a social work setting than others. (Also something I experience. I'm sorry if I'm projecting my personal experiences on to you, it's just how I find it best to explain >.<)

It makes sense that you might be looking less hard than you would without a job though. Right now this amount of work is working for you, and there's still the hope that whatever form the new company takes might keep you on in some way. Maybe seeking a new job is giving up that possibility, which might not feel right. There are a lot of factors that may be holding you back right now, so try not to be too harsh on yourself about that <3

Can you get me even more? XD I totally want to hug you right now, because I finally feel understood. And you opened my eyes to reasons I did not even consider before

I don't mind if you speak from experience, mine is similar

It's hard not to be so hard on myself, I always do it, I can't really help it QwQ

I haven't really been on here. I am so happy to see this thread still alive

i'm glad you all have a place to vent and not be judged in any way. I hope you all are okay and always stay positive

I have come to vent!

My name is Meagan and I am a recovering alcoholic/addict. As a result of these addictions, my quality of life sucks sometimes but I am clean today and working hard to remain that way. In November of last year, I granted sole custody of my 3-year-old daughter to my ex-husband. I am in the process of fighting to get her back.

Being in recovery teaches you SOOO much about who you really are, from the inside out. What is frustrating is the other people and by other people, I mean, parents, friends, exes...Even Children.

This is my journey but what I am finding is that others want to include themselves in this process and they need to butt out. I am finally doing this for no one other than myself and my family. That little lady being the closest thing to family that I have. Shit! What I am saying? She is my family and she is all that I have.

I am so frustrated today and I just had to type some of this out. It makes me feel better. Thanks for reading.

Kingdom of Knuffel

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