Leaves fell off the tree, so my sons tree-house appeared, didn't even knew they took up that much wood. It doesn't have a roof, but it does have walls. Like a crow's nest. >.>

Religion is quite a hard topic, dunno. I don't really believe, period. So I cannot say too much about it. Philosopher's tree sounds good though. ;-)

Kinda related to beliefs are holidays, do you all have the big gift giving things for Christmas? It's something I always kinda struggle with. :> Like, I want to give my kids something, but culturally I'm kinda lost and often like, let's do nothing at all. xD Maybe a bit sad? Dunno. Trying to think of one "bigger" thing for the boys, but it's not easy... :>

We do have the gift giving, yes, but we try to keep it as small as possible.
Not just christmas, but in general.

We buy him a gift, so do the grandparents and the cousin.
We can't stop my husband relatives (his own uncles/aunts) to buy something to the little one, although I really wish they did.
We got a bit nasty with some of my grandparents friends - who bought things for him, and they have never ever met my son! ¬¬

Gifts are nice, but they must mean something imho.
They must be something you buy for someone, which for some reason you think it's perfect for that person. Otherwise what's the point?

And I have never bought a Christmas gift for my husband, nor he for me.
We agreed on that when we started dating and I'm glad for it.

I never liked cash.
Neither receiving it nor giving it.
It's just so impersonal.

I'm fine with not getting anything.
But if someone can find a nice gift for me I'll be captivated.

I also rather buy one gift I think they will love, but we're probably without family again, so no gifts from that side. My gran always gives money, which I usually just send to their bank account, buuut if I get one thing, they'll get one thing. That's why I try to think of one big gift and maybe a few small things, like bubbles or a wallet or maybe even socks or a tee, something useful...

My husband is kinda anti-gifting, he never liked it, not even as a kid, but I kinda think he was a slightly weird kid? I do see that the boys really love and do enjoy a gift.

It kinda stings that it should be pretended as if a weird fat guy gave it to them. >.> I never really fed them the story, school does. So does tv, but here's the thing, the Dutch believe in St. Nicks who brings presents on December 5th. Hungarians believe that either "Winter dad"/"Little Jesus"/Santa takes out gifts. Always try to balance it, don't really want to go wild twice, I don't like stuff. :>


I remember gifting cash, but it's usually for weddings? For my friends I bought something tiny usually for birthdays, it was a habit, in my husband's group of friends there was never anything like that. So we just visited each other, chatted and had fun. Sometimes went out afterwards, but sometimes not. Lately I kinda like making something for someone who feels special to me. Baby clothes are easy, but I've made a quilt when my brother moved into his new house with his girlfriend, also made one for my mom... But baby clothes are just small and easy to send by mail. Usually quick to make as well. xD Also made Christmas gifts for the nephews and nieces a few times, 'cause it's usually every other year we go visiting them... So, dunno.

Anyway, my middle son put out a carrot for Dutch St. nick yesterday and I ignored it/eventually forgot about it. He's arrived them, the kids watch the news. Think we'll have to make an agreement that Nick will only come on fridays. >.>

Moi wrote:

My 4th grade teacher told all of us Santa wasn't real.
It made me cry in class 8u

That's horrible! I would never tell someone else's kid that Santa isn't real!

Come to think of it, I didn't even tell my own kid that Santa wasn't real. She figured it out on her own, but "played along" for a couple of years after.

My son has always known Santa is not real.
Or the Tooth Fairy for the case - his third tooth just fell a few days ago!

We tell him the tale anyway, but in the same way we tell him any tale - he knows that's what it is, we do not mean him to believe that it's really Santa.
We have explained to him that we say "Santa" because that's the date for "Santa's gifts" and that people just want to make you happy by gifting something - but the actual buyer is a secret, that's why we say it was Santa.

There is still plenty of room for illusion, without trying to fool them.
You may not want to explain the whole thing to younger kids, but once they reach an age in which they start making questions about it I think adults should reply with honesty.


@Jolien:
We also have two dates for gift-giving.
Santa (here called Papa Nöel) in Christmas day and also the Magic Kings on January 6th.
And, yes, I also try to keep it reasonable. Specially challenging with children though.

Yeah, and I have 3 boys, so in general they all want the same and like the same things, I sometimes feel I'm burried in stuff. xD

I don't think I ever let them believe the story, but I think they play with it, in case they'd miss out on the presents if they admitted it was untrue? We never really talked about it, guess I'm just too honest when they ask, so honest they don't believe me, lol. Or don't want to believe me. ;-)

They definitely feed the story at school/kindergarten... Tooth fairy they tried as well, but that I stopped immediately, that story is just too stupid imho. They save their own teeth in a jar if they want to, but quite a lot of them have been accidentally swallowed... :>



I do like the secret santa games, maybe I'll introduce them when they're a bit older, loved that as a kid. For St Nicks we'd make tiny poem for one other person and create a whole surprise packaging, usually related to the person. One girl in my class got a long stocking I sewed, 'cause she was always a chatterbox and the Dutch equivalent to that word is "chatter-stocking". Another guy wrote 3 things on his list "candy, swimming, green pen" I bought him the green pen, built a little swimming pool I filled with candy and hid the pen under the diving board. Made a tennisracket once for a friend, and some other things. When I was "little" my mom did help me, but afterwards we did that on our own. Especially the little poems, those were fun to hear, 'cause those would often be read out loud. :) :) That's a part of the tradition I did love. Not just buying a gift and giving it, but the package-making and the poems.


We had a teacher last year or the year before who taught some sort of Christian course (bible class I guess) at school and he told the kids that Jesus would never bring gifts and instead told the bible story. Dunno, my kids weren't there, but there is part of the population here who tell their kids Little Jesus brings out the gifts, so I remember that there were tears and angry parents as well. The only good part about all these stories is that kids suddenly turn into angels if they want to get gifts, lol. So that's the only reason I can think of to make the kids believe and just use the quiet times. xD